Janjiku Kepadamu

21 Oct

I overhead a conversation between two people on the train yesterday about how a friend of theirs dated for 6 months before tying the knot.

I was like, wow, that’s fast. Is it enough time to get to know the person? What happens if you dislike his way of eating or do you even know if he snores in his sleep?

But after dating for so long, and knowing at least only 80% of a person, I feel that marriage would teach you more than just meeting the person, 4x a week for max. 12 hours a day. I know I shouldn’t sound so ungrateful and that I found my soulmate but it hasn’t always been an easy ship to sail for us.

I’m so done with dating. I just want to get married and see what’s that like. Dating’s fun at the beginning but I’m so ready for that next phase in life. Yes, I’m impatient. That’s a trait of mine. I’m trying to save up as much as I can but it seems one-sided at the moment. I can go on for holidays after holidays but it doesn’t fill the void that I’m feeling right now.

I don’t want to see the world alone. I want to see it with someone. If you ever met me for the first time, you will see me as someone who is independent and confident. But I’m starting to see myself as a half rather than a whole person. I’m going to reference Lion King so if it doesn’t make sense to you, move along. When Kiara and Kovu was separated, she looked into her reflection at the river and she only saw half her reflection. That means she lost half of herself because Kovu completes her. That’s what I feel like.

It sucks.
I’ve been listening to Janjiku Kepadamu by Taufik and it calms me.
The lyrics are below:

Masih terasa belai tanganmu
Terbayang wajahmu dalam tidur ku
Renungan mata tak dapat ku lupa
Jelas tiada gadis setandingnya

Mengertilah wahai sayang ku
Segala terlukis di bibir mu….ohh

Ku kan selalu disisi mu
Dalam beribu hanya kau satu
Yang aku sayangi
Kasih abadi
Rela ku lakukan segala

Bagaikan bulan jatuh ke riba
Memberi erti hidup di dunia
Ku kan bersamamu setia selalu
Janjiku

Kau sering hadir dalam ingatan
Hadiri memenuhi harapan
Oh Sayang Pandangan mata tak dapat ku lupa
Masih tiada gadis setandingnya

Mengertilah wahai sayangku
Duniaku terlukis dibibirmu

Ku kan selalu disisi mu
Dalam beribu hanya kau satu
Yang aku sayangi kasih abadi
Rela ku lakukan segala

Bagaikan bulan jatuh ke riba
Memberi erti hidup di dunia
Ku kan bersama mu setia selalu
Janjiku padamu

Tanpamu hilanglah arahku
Sunyi tak bererti
Tak kan kau pernah jauh dihati
Kasihku mengerti

Ku kan selalu disisimu
Dalam beribu hanya kau satu
Yang aku sayangi kasih abadi
Rela ku lakukan segala
Bagaikan bulan jatuh keriba
Memberi erti hidup di dunia
Ku kan bersamamu setia selalu
Janjiku padamu

 

 

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